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I Love You Despite the Warning Signs

by Ennie Arden

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1.
I drove you to Charleston with your manic eyes and you laughed about what you did wrong I laughed along with you in disbelief always too mad so I save it for song Once there, I took you to dinner where we pretend we're together and order skillet mac n' cheese You make eyes at the waiter to drive home we're nothing You say, "It all means nothing to me." Got drunk on a rooftop took the elevator to meet our tour guide down in the square We awaited the others and flirted with strangers and wondered what brought them all there He showed us the ghosts in the churches, the courthouse, the whorehouse Your favorite was Fulton Street And me, the hopeless romantic, my mind held at ransom by the house of Annabel Lee Yeah we stopped at that mansion sweating on cobblestone and looked at each other knowingly as he passed round those pictures of Poe and his lovers All legends and lies and disease Your head on my shoulder I felt a bit better Sleep calling, I became your legs Bid farewell to our tour guide One more tired couple to enjoy that borrowed bed Well, falsely I figured we'd get back together once our ducks were more firmly in a row But your head on my shoulder was a wave goodbye After all, we're in the city of ghosts On a dark summer night when you're drunk and you're mad at me and that man, and the whole fucking world just remember I loved you and remember you can be loved when you lie to the next boy or girl La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la lie
2.
I force myself to have bad dreams by listening to ghost stories I'll believe in anything as long as you tell me you're still in love with me My idol is lost and as broken as me I know, that is why I don't kiss his feet Show me where things used to be And we'll solve the mystery of where Dakota sleeps The denser part, the Witch's Trees They freak you out but they comfort me Here you're more lost and broken than me I know, that is why you hate when I cling The grass is greener to me I can't see forest for trees But where the hell does Dakota sleep? Sleep with him Please It's a spare key under the frog How will I finish this song when I don't know where you sleep?
3.
Your hair was wet when you came to bed You'd been with him in the pool again when you promised me that it would end and I cried too loud, disturbed your sleep You asked me to leave my own bed The bed I own you commandeered you drank too much, need rest for fear of missing work or not being clear enough to fake The smiles for men older than me Well, I'll spend Halloween on the coast Try to make the most of your ghost It's a toast to you still haunting me Your necklaces have all changed You only call me when you want your things Fairy crown I bought upon your head You're still enabled by a boy who's dead Freak accident You play victim Well, I'll spend Halloween on the coast Try to make the most of your ghost It's a toast to you still haunting me Do you not want to be happy? I'm not saying that's with me I'm just saying you Keep picking the wrong thing Well I spent Halloween on the coast Tried to make the most of your ghost It's a toast to you still haunting me
4.
Beach Gun 01:30
Why should I live for myself When the only thing I've wanted was to live for someone else I was raised on two halves of a whole and I was raised to think I'll complete another Now I stare down this beach, the ends of our Mother Earth Not a crossroads A dead end Waves rolling in And I try to complete me
5.
Walking Lie 05:09
Cum in my mouth toes in the ocean Before I toss my phone Aubri calls me I guess I still need that scarf back I guess I'll postpone to another day But I still want this to I still want this to be the end of my life Fourth drink in hand, an invite from Amy I thought I'd make this case last another day But I guess I still need to explore her motive and to toss her studded boots across her room But I don't want her to I don't want her to be the love of my life Barely alive when we're dry Palm the sand and pull my tie You're a dopamine high for every guy You're a walking lie And I-- Fuck, I still want you to I still want you to be the end of my life Gun in my mouth, toes in the ocean I guess I'll postpone to another day
6.
Feet collide for the sake of it and I try to make the best of it Make it warm, make it natural Make it smooth, make it casual Faces hide behind reference and I try to see into them Make it real, make it actual Make it truth, make it factual What is it we're trying to do? Relate cause I wrote about you What you said, it couldn't be true Relate cause I wrote about you When we stopped you sang to me Rasp in the dark, Teeth left its mark When we stopped you sang to me clasping your arch, the sweating heart
7.
In the room behind the bookcase with the jukebox playing loud, no amount of lying will make you say it now I wake up to you crying with that pale tune phasing out I will hold you, knowing, And I'll say out loud "I shouldn't have seen this. I'll stay lost and lay back down. I shouldn't have seen this but I swear I've always wanted to reach out." In the room behind the bookcase, play it loud.
8.
On the edge of my bed you took a picture and said, "I never knew love until we had met." Why'd you rush into this? Why'd you mention marriage if you weren't ready yet? Love bomb at my gate, Trojan horse that you made I ran out of red flags to raise She made me sleep in her bed Her grandson, her pet "Lay back, it won't hurt. Just rest your head. It'll help you sleep." But I'd kick and I'd scream. Thought I was a brat, But it's not what it seemed. You and I, we're the same Victim in our name But victims take two sides Thought that we could relate Help to heal, not escape But you chose to run and hide Keep bombing other lives No one sees the warning signs I paid all the fines I love you despite all the warning signs I love you despite all the warning signs I love you despite all the warning signs
9.
Departures 04:08
Tonight I saw you as a pretty stranger then I sensed danger like it was deja vu and you and him walked two-by-two Desperate iris and blood pumps in my ear I can't hear you speak but I want to Behind the glass you react You react Please react Please react Show me something Please react Don't throw this away Please react I'm right beside you Please react Don't hole it away Please react Please react Tonight I saw you as a pretty stranger The swan song of me knowing you

about

Recorded in various homes between Gastonia, NC & Wilmington, NC. 2019-2020.

credits

released May 10, 2020

Produced by Jason W. Eckard
Written by Zach Evington
Mixed by Jason W. Eckard
Drums Engineered by Kenneth Englehardt
Mastered by Scott Lowder
Cover Art by Jennifer Hart

The players:
Zach Evington
David Lemke
Jason W. Eckard
Amber Thornburg
Daniel Allen
Austin Glover
Gavin Glover

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Ennie Arden Gastonia, North Carolina

Ennie Arden is the solo side project of Morrowville's Zach Evington.

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